Gradi Milenge feels the disappointment from Saturday’s 3-0 defeat to Nottingham Forest comes from the fact he and his teammates know they are far better than they showed.
All three Forest goals came in the first-half as Oliver Burke, Jorge Grant and Jack Blake got on the score-sheet to condemn The Bees to a second defeat in five days.
Saturday’s match was played at Griffin Park with spectators and coaching staff who don’t normally get a chance to see the Development Squad live present and Gradi felt that was one of the main frustrations of the day.
Speaking to Bees Player after the game Gradi said he and his teammates were disappointed that they had put in such a poor performance in front of so many people.
Gradi felt that The Bees gifted their table-topping opponents their three goals and that, in truth, they didn’t have to work too hard for their advantage.
“We are disappointed in today’s performance because we know that we are better than that,” said Gradi.
“Every day at training we work hard, show good quality and we know what we are about and to come and perform like that is really disappointing.
“The past weeks we have put in good performances and we have been winning games but it hasn’t been in a place where the people who can take us forwards in our careers are watching.
“This was a big game for us because we had people watching the game who have a bit impact on our position in this club.
“It was really disappointing that we played like that in front of them because we really wanted to please them.
“The goals that we conceded today were our own fault.
“We gave away cheap goals and when we did create chances we didn’t take them.
“At the end of the day it is about scoring and not conceding but today we conceded and didn’t score.
“They didn’t have to do much for their goals, they were given to them.
“We look at each other day to day and we respect everybody that I play with.
“I see what we can do in training and when you compare us to Nottingham Forest’s team we are capable of more.
“We haven’t shown that out there which is the disappointing thing.
“It would have been a totally different game if we could have scored that early goal but we didn’t take the chance.”
Nottingham Forest played with a 4-2-3-1 formation with the formidable physical presence of Gerry McDonagh their main outlet up front.
For 18-year-old Gradi and fellow Youth Team defender Tom Field, who played the second-half at centre-back rather than his customary left-back, it was a huge test both defensively and physically.
Gradi told Bees Player that it was a physical test which he enjoyed and one that he has to get used to playing Under-21 football.
“It was physical and I really enjoyed the battle,” said Gradi.
“He took it seriously and so did I.
“It was like a strongest man wins competition.
“I put in a good shift on him and he put in a good shift on me and I enjoyed that competition.
“In the Under-18s players are not as big and not as developed so days like this against a player like that are great for my development.
“Tom Field is a natural left-back so I had to communicate with him.
“He did brilliant at centre-back considering it is not his position.”
Saturday’s match was Gradi’s ninth Development Squad match of the season and his fourth start in a row in recent weeks.
Gradi feels that with every passing match he feels less and less like a Youth Team player playing up and more like a full member of the Development Squad.
The defender said it is a great confidence booster to have somebody like Lee Carsley putting faith in him and he wants to reward that confidence with good performances.
“I want to get to a stage where I don’t feel that I am playing up but where I am actually a development player,” said Gradi.
“I don’t want to look like I don’t belong on the pitch.
“Lee Carsley makes me feel comfortable so it is all there for me to go out on the pitch to show how good I am.
“Previously I have been on the bench, then play, then be back on the bench again so playing was like a new experience.
“Now that I am getting a chance I am getting my consistency and my confidence up.
“I need to start putting in the performances really.
“It is brilliant to have someone like Lee backing you.
“We respect people like Jon De Souza and Anthony Hayes as coaches and them believing in us is perfect.
“For someone with Lee’s knowledge and experience of the game to tell you that you are a good player he must see something in you.
“That is really encouraging.”
Bees Player subscribers can listen to the full interview here